Friday, July 15, 2011

My thanks to you all

Almost four months into outpatient therapy, frustration and more than a few tears it was time to say thank you. Thank you dear friends for being so kind and writing so many notes of encouragement. In addition my thanks as well to everyone who works so hard to help Dale get well. So I baked cookies and cupcakes. seems like food is universal among those who spend their days caring for others. For the most part we have been blessed with people who really care about those who come through their doors. Not to say that there are not still hard times. This whole thing has been filled with ups and downs, not the least of which came about a month ago. I was cruising along in my life. Times have been hard and stressful but I was managing. Then one day the OT told me that she wanted me to do a series of therapies at home everyday! She said she could only imagine how hard things were and how difficult it would be to add more. Hmmmm it was true. She could only imagine. I shed a lot of tears the next few weeks. I finally decided to be candid and had a conversation with the OT where I told her my concerns about this, I have no training and felt inadequate . I reminded her she was the one with the education. She then told me that she went to school to be able to train people like me to give therapy to their loved ones. I did get in line and now do several therapy's a day. It is only the last week that I decided this was not going away and shed my last tears for now. Well, maybe I do occasionally drop a tear or two. It seems I can manage almost anything as I do have help from family and friends.
The problem that remains is something I can do nothing to change. Over the years my role as the mother of a developmentally disabled child/adult has changed from being a mother to being a care giver. Now I find the same thing has happened in my marriage. I am no longer exactly a mother or a wife. Of all the changes over the last year, this is the most painful. I so miss being a mom and now being a wife. I believe this will change back to some degree but for now, it is what it is. In the meantime, I continue to be grateful for those who care so this week I made cookies. Wish I could do the same for all of you, but in the meantime love to you and yours. Hold them close.because you never know.

6 comments:

Miriam said...

((hugs))

Anonymous said...

Nadine you are tired. Know that even though you can not see "results" they are happening. All things this end of our lives happens slower than the beginning. I thank you for the cookies..... they are just perfect, fun, colorful and non calorie..... Martha would cheer you on as well..... cheers...for Nadine.

Jan said...

Lovely cookies and I can enjoy one (or even two) without the fear of extra calories. Life must be so difficult for you right now but I am sure your love and care is very much appreciated. As you say, we never know do we?

Quilter Jones said...

Nadine, I think of you so often and admire the strength you have. I am not sure I could do as well. Please know that I think about you often and look forward to seeing the progress you are making on that wonderful quilt.

Kathy said...

Awww Nadine I wish I could give you a big hug. And be there for you. I miss you and love you so much. Our phone calls are just not enough. But I know that you are one strong woman and your posting was just a small vent and you put it away and you are working hard to make things good for Dale. I wish you hadn't posted the picture of the cookies though. For those who have never tasted your sugar cookies they don't have a clue as to how good they taste and what they are missing. I do. I am eating an Oreo cooking and would much rather be eating one of your cookies. Love you much. Your sister, Kathy

Purple Pam said...

Those cookies look soooooo goooood. Sorry you are having so many hiccups along the recovery road. You are a strong woman, mother and wife. My thoughts and prayers go with you. Hugs, hugs, hugs.